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Inspired or inspiral

6/30/2014

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One thing I have noticed in my bid to stay inspired is what happens on Facebook. Every week I spend time going through posts of people I follow, watching inspirational videos, reading psychological articles, and comparing myself to other people's businesses. Hang on, what??

Comparison, as they say, can be the thief of joy - and despite being aware of this, it can still creep up and bite you on the behind. Let's face it, Facebook is good for so many things, but can also be an over-indulgence to see what friends, people we used to know and other businesses are doing better than us.

Remember though, that Facebook gives us the opportunity to crop our lives, to cut out the negative and hide the bigger picture. How honest are we really being? How authentic are we being by posting only the good pictures and posts? (Of course who really wants to have friends who post negative rant after negative vibe - eugh!) 

But if you are looking at other people's posts and wishing you could be that beautiful, funny, inspiring, active, thin, in love, independent, successful etc I am wondering who you think you are to believe you are not? 

To accept and love ourselves in the first step to living authentically, to be honest with ourselves about who we are is the biggest challenge many of us face, and to do this is the bravest thing you can do, because when you can do that, then you can achieve all that is perfect for you, at exactly the right moment.
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I saw these 15 landmarks zoomed out recently and love the fact that the bigger picture can be just as enlightening as the snippet we choose to show the world.

If you'd like some support in identifying and embracing the real you so that you can get clear on what you want and achieve your big goals with confidence contact me for a chat today.

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What are you teaching your child?

6/25/2014

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I recently went into a coffee shop where school children had been encouraged to write poetry in a specific format. The idea was to consider those around us as they sit alone at a cafe and write about what they are dreaming of. Interestingly the eight year olds continuously hit on two main themes; love, and money.

It made me wonder what we are really teaching the next generation; after all, to imagine what others are thinking, you mind read and must put your own thoughts in their voice;  so our children often think what they have learnt, be that from parents, teachers or the media. 


For them to have in their own minds that when people sit alone they are dreaming of wealth or worrying about money, that they are wanting more or stressing about their lack, would indicate they have heard this somewhere before, because really, can an eight year old actually worry about these things?

Other themes were around a better job, a bigger house, having friends... only one wrote from a child's perspective, of a boy who had it all, but dreamed of helping the poor. 
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Some time ago I posted a question on my Facebook page, asking what advice people would give to their younger self in only two words and there was a common theme; be brave; be confident; be yourself; accept yourself and so on. Yet according to the many young people I work with, their elders are not following their own advice. Young people are making career choices based on their parents' and teachers' experiences, and they are scared; scared of making mistakes, of not earning enough money, of being unhappy, stuck or stressed out, of constantly being tired at the end of the day, of being bored at work, of being alone or of failing.
But this is not a lesson on parenting as such, perhaps more a lesson in parenting yourself. If we were all to imagine we had a child inside of us, that we were in fact parenting a younger self, would you talk to yourself the way you do? Would you make different choices? Would you take greater risks and leaps of faith? Would you encourage yourself to notice all that you are good at? Would you praise yourself for your achievements at the end of each day? Would you notice all that you have and get creative with your resources? Could you be brave/confident/accept yourself?

So my ultimate question to you is; what are you teaching your 'inner' child?

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If you are dreaming about more, but are not sure how to get what you want, contact me today to find out how I can support you to reach your full potential and get out of your own way. Comments welcomed:
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Is it selfish to be selfish?

6/23/2014

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I was recently introduced to the concept of ‘the curse of lovely’ (book by Jacqui Marson) – sounds like a pretty nice curse to have if there is such a thing! How can we really be cursed to be lovely though? You may recognise yourself in this if you think you are someone who says yes to everyone, and then gets annoyed at self, angry at others for taking advantage, sad that people only seem to contact you if they need something, or guilty/anxious at the mere idea of saying NO!

I know many people like this, and they truly are lovely. Luckily because I know they are 'cursed' I am mindful of their affliction; I used to be the same – I’d drop everything to be there for people who needed me, when they needed me. Mine was more a ‘thoughtful curse’, that was my label, so of course I could never be anything but. Man, I would go out of my way to people please, and although it was acknowledged, I carried resentments that it wasn’t returned (it often was, not always from the same people, but kindness is always rewarded), in my moments (come on, we all have them) I’d throw my ‘life isn’t fair’ toys around the room, and yet still, when the next person  asked, I’d drop everything. Seriously, I am pretty sure I dropped a few hot dates with perspective lovelies to make sure the people in my life knew I was trustworthy, would do anything for them, and generally liked/loved me.  Of course I had high expectations of those around me too, making it almost impossible for people to live up to them. You have kids, schmee, if I need you I need you, look at all the times I have been there for you! Kinda thing. This of course ensured I was proved right, they didn’t love me enough.

OK, let’s get real here – this isn’t a curse, this is a limiting belief, an excuse to stay in the comfort zone.  If this is you, you are likely to be living your life in overwhelm, and preventing yourself from being as lovely as you can be, because those negative emotions you are carrying around are not attractive and are definitely not positively serving you; it's likely that no one else even knows they exist and if they have clocked them, chances are they’ll be avoiding you now! The important people in your life just think you’re lovely, if they think at all, perhaps they take it for granted that you’re lovely, but if you asked them and they had to think about it I’ll bet that’s what they’d say. They love you anyway, whether you say yes or no, and if they do get annoyed when you say no, that’s feedback, but don’t make their problem your problem!

It’s time to be honest about what makes you happy, and put yourself, health and wealth first. No one worthy of being in your life will resent you for that, no one will think less of you, in fact, some may even envy you your freedom (again, their problem to address).

If you love making other people happy, accept that, and notice all the times the universe gives it back to you in different ways.

So are you cursed, or are you lovely?

In my opinion, there is no curse of lovely – you just are… my question to you is, what else are you?

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To get rid of limitations and beliefs that are holding you back from reaching your full and happy potential find out more about how we can work together HERE
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Lucky in Loss

6/15/2014

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Today is Father’s Day and as I sit chilling out with Steve Wright’s Sunday morning tunes this beautiful song comes on and I am compelled to write this blog. (Ok, it was actually by Luther but I love this version)
When my mum met her ‘golf instructor’ (good one mum!), we all knew things were about to change. I was about 12 and as middle child it was my role to make this transition even more difficult for them - I had questions and objections on almost every decision they made I think!

Fast forward a few years, and in my early twenties, the man who had overcome every obstacle to make sure he could be with the woman he loved, died peacefully at home and I was by his side.

Watching this big strong man deteriorate was one of the hardest things our family ever had to endure, but now I consider myself one of the lucky ones. I almost feel sorry for people who haven’t experienced loss, because many are still to learn how precious life is. In those last few months of his life my step-dad taught me to focus on what you want, and to do what it takes to get what it, and if you can't...to be flexible, to love, to be honest and true, to tell people how you feel before it’s too late, to apologise for things that are on your mind (most of the time the other person may well have already forgotten and forgiven), to have no regrets, and to face your fears with a smile…. the biggest lesson for me; not to wait until the last moment.

We all hope to leave a legacy, and he certainly did.

Happy father’s day to everyone today; whether your dad is around or not, we can all be rich in life.

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Do feel free to comment and share;
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Live the Life of Your Dreams

6/10/2014

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Big thanks to Hazel McNab for capturing the essence of Holsam Life... and me! Go check out her other beautiful hearts!
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http://366hearts.com/2014/06/10/848th-heart/
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What is a breakthrough anyway?

6/2/2014

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People often ask me the above question and I am momentarily floored. This is not a good look for business, but what's fab about a breakthrough is that when you have them, you forget that you were ever in that place where you needed one. 

So let me explain. You know the moment when the sun breaks through on a cloudy day, where you see the light at the end of the tunnel, where you feel euphoria at your sense of achievements? I digress... how about when a chick has been tapping away at his shell in his bid for growth and freedom, the fresh air hits his tiny beak and he can finally relax, or when you get that light bulb moment and a sense of clarity? OK, I'm off again...

The fact is, a breakthrough is whatever it is you want it to be. Do you feel that life is a little foggy and you could do with the sun on your face? Do you feel you have been tapping away on something for an age, feel exhausted and think you're getting nowhere? 

Don't take it from me, my clients know exactly what I am talking about when they have their breakthroughs...

"I contacted Sam and she started me on her ‘breakthrough’ programme.  Today I can positively say a breakthrough is exactly the right word.  A lot of the opening of eyes and dawning of positivity. gradually lifting of barriers, feeling better and better every day.  But there was definitely a ‘click’ moment where the path of progress, change and positivity started feeling like the obvious choice every day."  

Hope that answers that question.
If you are ready for your breakthrough, whether dreaming big or taking first steps, let me support you. 
I offer various ways for you to have your own breakthroughs, from one to one work to online programmes. Contact me TODAY to see how I can support you to breakthrough and get what you want.
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    Sam D Holman, EzineArticles Basic PLUS Author

    Hi! My name is Sam 

    I'm an advocate of brave, passionate about helping people to break through their bull shit to live life in the amazing and achieve their goals easily. 

    I believe that brave is the new beautiful... and I want you to believe that too.
    x

    P.S Please feel free to comment and share. 

    CONTACT ME HERE

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